June 20, 2012

Chinese Reporter Mistakes Discovered Sex Toy As Rare Underground Mushroom

Liucunbu, China (The Weekly Vice) - A double-headed vagina sex toy found in a remote village in Liucunbu China made national news last week as villagers and reporters struggled to identify what they believed was a mystical and rare fungus.

According to Chinese media, local villagers in Liucunbu found the sex toy while drilling a new well shaft. Puzzled as to what the object could be, some residents called a local news station who promptly sent a reporter, Yunfeng Ye, to the scene.

During the news broadcast, reporter Ye speculated about the object's identity, and her investigative journalism reached the conclusion that the object was likely a rare mushroom.

Villagers crowded around a blue bucket containing the rare fungus, taking measurements and commenting about it's "never-been-seen before" physical attributes.

"It has an eye and a nose, but we don't know what it is," says one villager as the news report continues.

The villagers and Ye determine that the object is likely a "meat mushroom" of the Ganoderma lucidum species. The reporter explains that the fungus is rarely scene by humans because it grows underground.

Villagers held the rare fungus up to the camera, showing both ends (the vaginal end and the anal end) of the sex toy. The spongey smooth texture of the object only added to the speculation that the it must surely be a fungus of some kind.

Following the news broadcast, dozens of television viewers who recognized the object as a sex toy called the station to break the bad news to them. The station aired an apology the next day.

"Our program last night made everyone laugh," stated the apology. "expressing regret for an uncomfortable and misleading report. Our reporter is very young and sheltered.

Danny Vice
The Weekly Vice

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