January 22, 2008

Virginia Delegate Lionel Spruill Vows To Ban Your Testicles



Richmond, Va (The Weekly Vice) -- Your testicles may soon be outlawed in Virginia. Of course we're not referring to human anatomy here, but pretty close to it.

Those little replica testicles that some truck owners attach to the trailer hitch of their truck has drawn the attention of a lawmaker in Virginia who are seeking to have the practice banned.

Delegate Lionel Spruill introduced a bill on January 9th, which called for a ban against displaying replicas of male genitalia on vehicles. The bill identified the practice as a safety issue because of it's potential to distract other drivers. If the measure passes, offenders could be cited with a misdemeanor charge that would be punishable with a maximum fine of $250.

The idea for the ban came from a citizen who's young daughter had spotted a similar display on the back of a vehicle and asked her father to explain what they were. The citizen then brought the issue to Spruill who promised to address the issue.

Spruill, who was widely chastised when he attempted to outlaw baggy pants in 2005, vowed he would not be deterred from pursuing his proposed legislation vigorously. He announced his intentions to bring a sample of the replica testicles before the state legislature to argue his case.

The Weekly Vice Reaction:

Apparently Virginia lawmakers have so successfully managed the legislature, that spending state tax dollars to pursue baggy pants and toy testicles have become a major priority of the state.

Spruill filed this bill while acknowledging it may make him a "laughing stock", so he obviously understands how silly it looks - however he's on a mission to ban the 'unsightly' and as long as Virginia wants to entertain his indulgence for 'all things salacious' then more power to them.

Since this bill seeks to specifically ban truck ornaments in general, instead of specifying the sexual nature of this particular ornament, we believe it will be thrown out. But if it isn't, be forewarned. Virginia wont tolerate your testicles on it's public roadways for much longer.

Danny Vice
The Weekly Vice
http://weeklyvice.blogspot.com/

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4 comments:

Ambrgurl22 said...

I've seen those before. I thought it was too funny, although at first I didn't believe what I was seeing. A pair of balls bouncing along when the truck hit bumps.

MadMaximus said...

I had them on my truck, except they weren't metal like the picture. It's really no big deal. Damn politicians are out to stomp out every last bit of fun aren't they?

ALLTHENUTZ said...

I think these are the funniest.. I put up some pics at my blog and EATING BULLS BALLS. Hey does size matter :)


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Anonymous said...

First of all, I don't believe the father's story about his young daughter questioning him ever took place. Sounds like a fab job just to make an issue. Guess that same father shouldn't take his daughter to a zoo 'cuz she might be curious about those mysterious objects dangling between the legs of almost every large four-legged mammal. God forbid she might ask what they are...how tragic!

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